Chicago Figures Out Cause of Homicides: Untaxed Bullets

Tad Cronn

10/18/2012

Chicago residents worried about the city’s soaring homicide rate can rest easy. After painstaking consideration during what was no doubt many rounds of double martinis, officials are at last ready with an answer.

Just tax bullets, says Cook County Board President Toni Preckwinkle. She has announced she will submit a budget proposal next week that would slap a nickel tax on each bullet sold and $25 per firearm.

Chicago’s crime families immediately went into conference to examine the results of Preckwinkle’s proposal on their budgets and announced they would have to cut back gun murders by at least 15 percent and shift some more business into the concrete galoshes department to compensate.

Clearly, officials have the bad guys on the run.

And now… the rest of the story. …..